I got this from Sandi in an email today and had to share it with you. Your job search is marketing of yourself. She is a marketer. Her ideas about deciding what causes you pleasure or pain directly relates to your job search. — Bryan Dilts
Change What You Associate Pain And Pleasure With
By: Sandi Krakowski
You may not realize it right now but you are, at this very moment, being motivated and influenced by two things. These two things literally control how you make decisions, when you’ll make them and quite frankly, IF you’ll make them at all… or sit in limbo.
Many people go through their day, all day long, without ever giving much thought to these very important two things. Myself included! It’s not like I get up in the morning and take a conscious thought of how these two things are motivating me…. but they are. Deep inside my subconscious mind, inside your mind as well, these two things are moving everything… forward, backwards or even holding at a standstill.
What we associate pain and pleasure with is the single greatest motivator in everything we do.
I’m here to tell you that 8 years ago this month I made a decision to CHANGE on a very conscious level what I personally associate to pain and pleasure.
Maybe you’re like me and you’ve always thought it painful to get a critique on something. Coming from the childhood I did where I was motivated nearly every single day by my performance, it was obvious that pain was directly attached to any kind of critique or opinion. And let me say this, this kind of underlying belief did NOT help me as an entrepreneur and thriving business owner.
If you associate pain to any opinions, suggestions, input or critiques, because maybe you didn’t have the loving, nurturing and caring support you deserved as a young person growing up, you will do anything to avoid these at all costs. Here’s the startling part, you’ll do it without even thinking.
You’ll ignore suggestions.
Fear critiques.
Hate when someone asks you to wait because something else must come first. You can see where I’m going with this.
However, 8 years ago I began a process of growing my life and my business simultaneously that caused me to make a decision to change this underlying belief. Now I am extremely happy when my mentor or someone I ask for input gives me critiques, wisdom and advice on how I can improve. It also changed something else in me very dramatically- who I’d listen to when it came to input on my business. I’m now very cautious, in a very good way, who has the privilege of speaking into my life and giving me suggestions for my business.
Listening to the postman and his thoughts on what we should do to grow our business to the next level, or letting that person who has never made millions of dollars, let alone even thousands of dollars in an online business give me their ideas is now attached to pain. And rightfully so. I don’t want the critique and input of someone who hasn’t done what I am seeking to be exceptionally good at! I do however pay more than six figures per year to get the best in the world to give me their thoughts. Because I associate extreme pleasure to moving to the next level!
So my question for you today is this- who are you taking input, ideas and suggestions from?
If you let someone at Walmart that you bump into, or let’s get a little more personal, that relative of yours give you input on whether to invest into your business the first thing they’ll say is, “Can you afford it?”
Newsflash, we were more than $450,000 in DEBT when I invested into my business! I didn’t consult with my checkbook to determine whether or not I could ‘afford’ to invest into something that could change my entire life and business. That kind of mindset comes from someone who has a fixed income anyways.
Trying to build a bigger future on your current income is a faulty business model!
No, I listened to the input of multi-millionaires who reminded me that to increase my own skill and to develop what is necessary in business it would take some sacrifice. It would take a commitment to “be here a year from now” and to not give in the first time hardship came. I sold things on eBay, learned to cook very inexpensively so I COULD do whatever it took to always have a mentor.
We also took an inventory on what we were spending our money on…. and made a conscious choice… pain and pleasure, remember that?….to associate pain with not moving to the next level. This motivated me to avoid whatever held me back. PERIOD.
It took a “Balls to the wall!” approach when it came to my business… which means in plain English “Do the things that make money for crying out loud” and don’t sit on Facebook all day chatting about the cutest things you can find on Pinterest and how “one day” I’ll pay cash for them when my business that I’m building on free tools finally grows.
It is my personal conviction that when someone says to me that they cannot invest into their skill set because of a layoff at work, or a down turn in their personal economy, they simply do not understand what it takes to build a business. They are still locked in a corporate mindset that says, “This is how much we earn and this is how much we can spend because it won’t change unless someone else increases my pay.”
YOU my friends have got to associate pleasure with doing the work and increasing your own paycheck because YOU have made a decision to not settle for less.
If you want a pay increase, you are going to have to make sure your skill set lines up with what commands and directs a pay increase! And you’ll need to associate PLEASURE with the entire process.
You can’t take on a typical a college degree mindset, where it becomes painful and tedious to study and learn things. Stop. Check that thought. Is this your belief? Change it!
You must flip that and begin associating pleasure to learning and more pleasure to activating what you learn!Attach PAIN to staying the same way, associate deep internal pain to doing things as you’ve always done them. You are being motivated every single day by what you associate pain and pleasure to.
This is how you pay off debt, you change your habits, you make decisions correctly and quite literally, you change your life.
The question becomes, will you do what it takes?
ONLY you can decide. For those who are ready? I’m here to take you to the next step. Come on over to my Facebook page right now and tell me that YOU have made a decision to do whatever it takes!
http://www.facebook.com/sandikrakowskibiz
With love,
Sandi Krakowski