How to make your boss really happy when he fires you

Make your boss really happy when he fires you.  Tell him, “You can’t fire me, I quit!”  Then sign the papers that say you resigned.  He’ll soberly say, “That really hurts to hear you say that.”  As you leave the building he will take your papers, kiss them and pump his arms in the air in a victory dance.

Instead, if you can, insist on being fired.  If you quit you could be signing away your rights to unemployment compensation.  At the very least you are guaranteeing that you will have to defend your right to unemployment checks at a hearing.

If you are being fired, don’t resign.  If a prospective employer calls your old company, they will either tell all about why they fired you, or merely give the dates of your employment.  They won’t say, “He resigned right before we fired him.” That wouldn’t help your job search anyway.

There is one situation in which it is better to quit.  That is when you are being offered a sweet severance package and the company guarantees in writing to allow you to receive unemployment checks. That’s it. I suggest in that case you get a lawyer to check the agreement.  It will be $100 well spent.

Get fired with enthusiasm.  It pays better than quitting with enthusiasm.

Something To Do Today

Do you expect to be fired or laid off?  Start searching for a job now.

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Tomorrow:     How to read a book or magazine

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