Tag Archives: counteroffer

Why would your boss think you are as bad as a cheating husband?

This may be counter-intuitive, but when you try to leave your job, your boss looks at YOU as the cheating husband.  Your boss sees YOU as the betrayer no matter how many times he has failed to follow up on his promises. He may have not given you any raises in 4 years, but he sees you as the person who is making his life miserable.

Your boss sees himself as the righteous WIFE in this story when you quit.  If you agree to stay due to his pleadings, pay raises, promotions, and cajoling, he absolutely loses his trust in you.  Here is how he feels.

Your boss thinks he is the wife in this example

Your husband asked for a divorce last week. He quit. He has been dating another woman who is so much nicer than you. He is cheating. He told you about her looks, personality, family, and friendship. He was preparing to move out until last night. You begged him to stay for the kids’ sake. You agreed to change the way you treat him. You will start exercising, get a facelift and breast implants. He finally agreed to dump that floozy. It is so nice to have him in your arms again. He’s yours. (Remember, you are the husband, he is the wife who is getting surgery to get you to stay.)

It’s two weeks later. He needs to “work late” for the second time this week. Can you keep yourself from calling his office?

He’s gone on 3 overnight business trips this month. Are you going to check the credit card statements when they come?

You called at 3 pm and the receptionist said he is out of the office. You really want to get an ankle bracelet to track him, don’t you?

Your boss

When you tell your boss you are quitting, and he sweet talks you into staying, he has already lost faith in you. The next time you have a dental appointment he is going to wonder. When a big opportunity comes up he’ll remember that you took an extra half hour at lunch one day last week. He’ll give the big project to someone else who he is sure will stay in the company and finish it.

Once you give notice you are quitting, leave. Come back in 6 months if you were wrong. Then your boss will know that your commitment to your new employer was firm, but things didn’t work out. When you accept his pleas to stay, he knows you just screwed the other company. He’ll be wondering when you will screw him.

That’s real life.

Something to do today

Prepare a resignation letter that only says: Thank you for the chance to work here. My last day of work will be xx/xx/xx.

Now practice this phrase 20 times: “Let’s not talk about why I am leaving, let’s talk about how I can make the transition easier on you.”


World destruction by accident

The smartest guy in the room

Humility and job suicide, there is a difference

Think twice before accepting a counteroffer to stay where you are at

When you’ve secured a job offer, yo may believe your search is over.  But you’re not done yet.  After you receive an offer, your employer may make a counteroffer.  Should you accept it?


I just quit and my old boss wants me back

Counteroffer!  You quit and your old boss wants you to stay.  They’ll pay way more than your new job.  You’ll get an office instead of a cubicle.  The actual President came to ask you to stay.  It just makes sense to stay, right?

Don’t do it.  Sever a snakes head with one blow and it dies.  Slowly cut off the tip of its tail and it will turn and bite you.

This is a “Fear Factor” moment. You’ve been eating cockroach puree for years.  Now they want to give you a 20% raise and an office.  Will that make the cockroach puree taste better?

In the last month we have seen two people, who stayed because of fabulous counteroffers, soon leave their old company. We are talking amazing counteroffers:  raises, promotions, new responsibilities, respect.

They quit again, even for lower pay.  The reason is that the old company didn’t really change.  The opportunities didn’t really change.  Their bosses treated them nicely only under blackmail.

Yes, I just wrote about how to “blackmail” your boss without quitting.  What I really wrote was “How to ask for a raise or promotion.”  If you are seriously underpaid or under appreciated and they won’t change, don’t go back to them if they promise to do what is right only when someone else wants to hire you away.

90% of people who take a counteroffer are looking for a new job in 6 months.  The rate approaches 100% after a year.  That’s because counteroffers are forced.  Your old boss feels betrayed.  He needs you for one more quarter and is looking hard for your replacement. You just gave up a great opportunity and he only wants to replace you without a disruption.  Who wins?  Not you!

I must admit, I see some counteroffers and say, “How can they refuse to stay?”  Inevitably that person is soon gone. Why? Their job was so bad that it took a huge bribe to get them to stay.  The size of the bribe indicates the true foulness of the position.

Think about it. If you are offered a huge reward to stay, you were robbed for the previous year.  Will they also offer a year’s back pay as an immediate bonus?  If they do, how about for the year before that?  How guilty is their conscience?

Don’t accept a counteroffer.  The chances are less than 1 in 30 that it will work out.  No matter how much they pay you, a cockroach milkshake is still a cockroach milkshake.

Something To Do Today

Ask your boss for a raise or promotion if that is what would keep you there.  If they don’t give it to you freely, don’t accept it as the fruits of blackmail.


Next:     Quit or be fired?

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