Category Archives: Quitting or Fired

My job: If I don’t die tonight

Posted on December 30, 2015 | Leave a comment
cemetery statue and cross

Are you afraid to change jobs? What if you don’t die tonight?

Are you keeping your job because you are afraid to change?  Do you hate your company but hate looking for a job more?

My wife’s best friend was having chest pains a couple of years ago.  She spent the night in the hospital’s heart treatment center.  She’s one of the nicest, busiest people I know.  Friends and family came to visit. If she dies she has nothing to worry about.  But what if she lives?

Silly question.  She’ll do great.  She is doing exactly what she likes in life.  If she had to cut back, she could.  She would still be living life to its fullest. Carpe jugulum. She grabs life by the throat and throttles every last ounce of joy and fulfillment out of it.

Do you grab life with both hands?

I’m not talking about engaging in hedonistic self destruction.  I’m talking about working at a job that is fulfilling, even if you don’t like it at times.  Do you have goals you are reaching for?  Is your life in tune with the direction you like to go?  Do you see a future?  Are you growing?

Are you keeping your current job because you don’t dare leave?  Bad idea.  Keeping your current job because you are learning is a great idea.  Keep your job because it allows you to grow even if you hate your boss, fine. If you need the money for your family and education this job can be a stepping stone.  Stay because you are getting something good out of it.

Money isn’t everything.  Two books that try to put money in the proper perspective even though they seduce you to desire more are The One Minute Millionaire and The Power of Positive Thinking.

If you live another day or another 50 years will you be happy with where you’ve gotten and where you are going?  In a year, what will you regret not starting today?

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The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. (Thoreau)

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Your Workplace WMD – poison and disease attitude

Posted on December 10, 2015 | Leave a comment

 

team in gas masks with stretcher

Workplace poison emergency response team

This is about your job.

Do you know why ISIS and Al Qaeda have not used small pox, nerve gas, or sarin in an attack on the USA yet?  Because they are not as fast, painless, or sure as a car bomb….in killing the attacker. They are scared of how painful it would be for the terrorist to use those WMD’s.

Terrorists are smarter than people who are mad at their boss or a coworker. Workplace attitude poisons and diseases kill attackers more horribly and slowly than they kill their target. ISIS terrorist attackers want to die quickly and relatively painlessly so they won’t use poison and disease. People who are mad at their boss die slowly, painfully, and publicly from their own venom.  Their boss rarely suffers. The terrorists are smarter than upset workers.

Malice sucks up the greater part of her own venom, and poisons herself.  (de Montaigne)

Every day I talk to people with serious reasons to leave their jobs.  Most briefly state the problems, then go on with their job search. They are winners.  Some state the problem and then they try to poison and infect the people who contributed to the situation.  They are losers.  Examples of stupidity, gross unfairness, lawlessness and cheating are given, then repeated, then complained about. The trouble is that the attacker slowly poisons himself.  His pain is horrible to behold.

What is left is a twisted wreck of a person who is unemployable.

So what do you do?  Forgive.  Forget. Get on with your life.  The best revenge you can have is to be happy while they are miserable.  Let them wallow in depravity.  Don’t hop in the mud puddle to wrestle the pigs and expect to stay clean.  Forgive them.  Pen them up in a part of your life that is through.  Don’t talk about them.  Don’t even think about them.  Stop letting them ruin your life.

If you are still employed, you can pay them back.  Stop talking about them.  Stop worrying and fretting. It will drive them nuts when they can’t seem to get to you.  If something illegal is going on, quit now and tell the police.  Otherwise stay there, find a new job, and then leave.  They’ll hate having to replace you.  Never say an unkind word about them to anyone, just find another job, give notice and leave.  Then forget them. That is the ultimate revenge.

Something To Do Today

How To Stop Worrying And Start Living by Dale Carnegie can help.  It can help you get rid of anger and start living for the good things in life.

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Coming:

How to find a job at a convention

What to leave out of your resume

Persistence

Job security – what permanent means

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Posted in Attitude, Focus, Quitting or Fired

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Liars, how we catch them

Posted on December 8, 2015 | Leave a comment

On a call with a candidate I am told,  “I was fired from my last job for lying on my resume.  I put down that I had completed my degree when I was 6 credit hours short.  They caught it 6 months after they hired me.  Now what do I do?”

fraud alert road sign

We catch amazingly smooth liars.

We catch liars on a regular basis.  The most common lie is stretching a job’s hire or fire date so that there is less time between jobs.  Some people make up a job and add it to the resume.  Others remove a significant job that ended disastrously.  Education is always a tempting place to lie.  Certifications make a big difference in getting your resume past screeners, so some people lie.

So, how do we catch liars?  Often they forget they lied to us in the past and they change their lies.  We have resumes and interview notes from two decades ago in our files.  When we compare them we find discrepancies.  We also check references.  When a person talking about you comes up with a different story, we do more research.  Education and certifications are all very easy to check.

A lie is any communication given with intent to deceive. (unkn)

One other way liars are caught is by alternate references.  We network into your old companies without telling you who we are calling.  For instance, we had a candidate who said he interned with a firm that disappeared in the Enron scandals.  That job rounded out his resume nicely.  The only trouble is that the man who had been managing interns still works in this area.  He knew the candidate never worked there.  The job would have been his even without the intern experience.  That lie lost him the job.

We don’t check alternate references to catch liars.  We do it to get fresh information and to keep our networks alive. Right before writing this we checked an alternate reference from a job the person had 12 years ago. It was a great recommendation of that person.  That is what we look for.

Do liars prosper?  Sure, at times. For a while.  But something happens to them. Liars we catch usually tell us, “Everyone lies.  I just got caught.”  Over time they lose the ability to really trust others.  They lose the ability to feel when others are honest or deceptive.  In business that will eventually be fatal. Business really is built on trust. Contracts are merely to put in writing what each side already trusts the other to do.

Something To Do Today

Do you need to correct your resume?  Then do it.  Send the new one to recruiters along with a note that the last one was incorrect.  Most people are willing to let you correct a mistake, even if it was a lie.

If you have been hired based on a lie you may want to correct it now, before you get a promotion that has an automatic background check.  You can submit a corrected resume or ask your boss for help to get that certification you really don’t have. Sure, you might get fired.  What is peace of mind worth to you?

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Coming up:      Poisons

How to work a convention

What to leave out

Persistence

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Posted in Quitting or Fired, Resumes

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Forgetting to get a job – Liar research day

Posted on November 24, 2015 | Leave a comment

“Five wasted years due to a liar.  I was promised equity, part ownership, and then they sold the company without giving it to me.  I was robbed. I’ll never trust anyone again.  Now I’m in it for the money.  I’m in it for me.”

He has the skills to succeed, but who would hire him for an honest corporate level job now? He broods on wrongs done to him. His attitude and morals are shot. He is sure everyone lies and cheats. Every time he sends me a resume, it has incredible lies on it.  He only remembers the bad, never savoring the good.

Some places will hire him for sales or sales management because of an undeniable track record.  But will he cheat the customers or help them?  Will he ever be a customer centered salesman again? He will be fired soon.

I have kept in contact with him for years and he has never recovered. He refuses to move on mentally. Morally he remains disfigured, brooding, and unreliable.

The inability to forget is infinitely more devastating than the inability to remember. (Twain)

picture of hate

Grabbing offenses tightly only pushes needles through your hand.

There are a lot of people like him. I ask these scarred souls, “How soon did you figure out your boss was lying?”  Usually the answer is, “I found out 3 months (or 3 days) after I started.  But then it was too late to take another job.”  I ask, “Why didn’t you get the promises in writing?”  The answer is always, “I didn’t think I needed to.  He kept telling me he would do it.” By then you knew your boss was a liar, so you trusted him??

Time to forget that you were cheated.  You made two mistakes: 1. You decided to keep working for a liar, and 2. You decided you didn’t need promises in writing from the liar.

What you should do is learn from the two lessons above and move on.  Refuse to work for a liar again.  Get promises in writing.  And now start remembering all the good people you have known.

Good people attract good people.  You will find that people who tell the truth in business don’t mind putting their promises in writing.  As a matter of fact, they prefer putting promises in writing so that there is no dispute later about what they promised.

Now forget how you were robbed.  That was one bad boss.  No need to tell the story over and over.  Frankly forgive him.  If you are suing him, let your lawyer worry about it.  If you aren’t taking him to court, drop it completely.

Learn from your mistakes.  Continue trusting people.  Get promises in writing.  Learn the right lessons and forget the pain.  You’ll be happier.

Something To Do Today

Liar research day.  Who do you know who says they were robbed in a job or business?  Come on.  You probably know a few.  Ask them 2 1/2 questions:

  1. How soon did you figure out he was lying and why did you stick with him so long?
  2. Did you get all those promises in writing?

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Later:   I hate firefighters

Dead fish

Poisons

Liars

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Posted in Attitude, Focus, Quitting or Fired, Uncategorized

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How to resign your job – part 2

Posted on August 31, 2015 | Leave a comment

The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn. (Russell)

bridge-512086_640-pixabay“Take this job and shove it” – can really hurt YOU

Every week I hear, “I know that candidate from a previous job.  I wouldn’t touch him with a ten foot pole. He was not a team player.”

Sometimes that comes from the way the person left a previous team.  Often the comment arises from an incident a decade or more before the comment.  Someone burned bridges as they left a job.  They were rude, bitter, destructive or insufferable.

Your boss may be getting ready to quit too.  He could be your new boss again at your next job, or in 10 years.  A current teammate may be on your future interview team. Leaving in a professional manner makes it possible to work together with members from your old team in the future.

Professionals leave relationships intact.  I have heard it put: “Be wise as a serpent, harmless as a dove.”  Don’t let people take advantage of you, and don’t purposely hurt anyone.

We are back to the right way to quit.  Hand your boss a simple letter that states:

“I have appreciated the opportunity to work for XYZ company.  I am resigning with my last day of work on -date-.”

Then keep your mouth shut.  Say only positive things.  Never brag about where you are going.  Cooperate with your boss and coworkers.  Avoid all questions about where you are going geographically or with which company.

Be wise as a serpent and harmless as a dove.

Something To Do Today

Have you got a network list?  People who you are actively cultivating to help your career should be in that network. How many of them would like to work for the same type of company you find ideal?  Count it up.  Really.  Count it up.  Doesn’t it make sense to have them as future allies?

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Tomorrow:     A successful email

Later:              The guy who invented running died

I make the milk every morning, my wife will keep me

Propagating blueberries guerilla style

Great ideas are a dime a dozen

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Posted in Attitude, Quitting or Fired, References

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How to resign your job – part 1

Posted on August 28, 2015 | Leave a comment

“The non compete clause is never enforced.  I’m not worried if they find out where I am going.”

A very real guy I know said that to his new boss.  He went back and bragged to his old coworkers about the new job.  He got a phone call from his old company’s lawyer.  Guess what?  They are enforcing the non compete clause.  If he fought it, he very well might beat it.  But during the ensuing battle he couldn’t work. So he is staying.  What do you think his career pway_out-710184_640_pixabayath looks like now?
Resignation should always be done with a simple letter stating:

I appreciate the opportunity I have had to work for XYZ Company.  I am resigning my position effective <date>.

Don’t say where you are going.  Don’t brag to your coworkers.  Don’t even admit which state or industry you will be in.

What if there is not a non compete clause in your contract?  You should resign the same way.

Why?

You may be accused of bringing trade secrets to the new employer.  They may not be able to stop you, but they can still cause you and your new company pain in the courts.

Resigning should always be done the same way.  Simply and quietly. Gloating is never a good idea.

Something To Do Today

Don’t quit today unless you already have a new job.  Then quit in a short professional letter of resignation. Practice avoiding questions about where you are going to work.

Suicidal glory is the luxury of the irresponsible.  We’re not giving up.  We’re waiting for a better opportunity.  (Bujold)

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Later:  How to resign – Part 2

A successful email

The guy who invented running died

I make the milk every morning

Propagating blueberries guerilla style

Great ideas are a dime a dozen

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Confronting your boss – 5 things to do to get fired

Posted on August 26, 2015 | Leave a comment

fight-655390_640-pixabay“I won’t do things that way. You have to do it my way. You don’t have the guts to fire me,” the company President told the CEO after a long loud discussion about the direction the company was going.   The CEO left and took a 30 minute timeout.  Upon returning the boss said, “Do you want to say anything?”  The answer, “No. I’m right.”  The reply was, “You’re fired. You have half an hour to clean out your desk.”

The guy was shocked.  In his heart of hearts he knew he was right so he made a few calls to shareholders to get support.  In half an hour the boss returned and said, “I gave you half an hour and you are not gone yet.  You can walk to the door with me now, or I can call the police.”

Here’s the mistakes this real person made:

  1. He challenged his boss’s authority
  2. He called his boss a coward
  3. No apology was offered for vicious insubordination
  4. An open attempt to create a mutiny was started
  5. There was no backing down or offer of compromise.

How do you deal with your boss’s mistakes?  I admit I have done every single one of these wrong things to a boss or two of mine in the past.  Luckily my rebellion was much milder.  I never got fired for it.  I didn’t get promoted either.

Some great ways to confront your boss are in How To Win Friends And Influence People by Dale Carnegie.  You’ll find it enlightening.

Something To Do Today

Don’t see if you can get fired.

Read How To Win Friends And Influence People

Cynicism is not realistic and tough.  It’s unrealistic and kind of cowardly because it means you don’t have to try.  (Noonan)

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Later:  How to leave your job

A successful email

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Posted in Attitude, Quitting or Fired

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Getting past a glass ceiling

Posted on August 3, 2015 | Leave a comment

True story: She can’t get a promotion.  Not even a bigger title.  The “Good Old Boys” all admit she is doing a great job.  She saves the company literally 5 to 50 times her salary every year.  She will never be promoted.  It is because she is a woman.  I know her.  I know her company.  There is no way up.  Even shooting her boss will only get a different man promoted ahead of her.

She can make her own life a living hell by suing the company.  She’ll lose even if she wins.  They would figure out a reason to fire her in a few years and then she’d have a hard time finding a job.

There are two ways to deal with a glass ceiling.

  1. Go around it.
  2. Get a new job.

Go around it

To go around the glass ceiling you need a mentor.  It is doubtful that your own boss will really help since he isn’t helping you now.  Invite someone 2 or 3 levels above you to lunch.  At lunch, don’t condemn your boss. Ask for help to grow.  Write down the advice you get.  Set up an appointment to have lunch again in 3 to 6 months.  Go over your progress with the person.  Report on how you have improved.

Scared?  Do you have to go to the owner, CEO or chairman of the board?  Do it anyway.  What have you got to lose?  You may be surprised that the person that far above you really wants to help winners like you succeed.  And if they refuse to help, try method 2.

If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read, “President Can’t Swim”.  (Johnson)

Get a new job

Keep your old job as you search for a new one.  Chronicle your accomplishments in a job journal.  Report to your boss every week on your progress at work even if he doesn’t want to see it.  Take the reports and put your greatest accomplishments in your resume.

Network, contact recruiters, apply to good jobs at good companies.  Set criteria for moving and when you find the job, move.

Something To Do Today

Seriously ask yourself, why haven’t I been promoted this week?  Why haven’t I gotten a raise or a bonus this week?

Now write down in your job journal what you can do to get a promotion, raise or bonus as quickly as possible.

Will that make you happy?  Is that what you really want?  If yes, go do it.  If no, better figure out what you really should be doing.  There is no time like the present to change your life.  You get to be happier longer if you change today.

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Later:  The hours game

Confronting your boss

How to leave your job

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Posted in Accomplishments, Attitude, Perseverance, Promotions, Quitting or Fired, Raises

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Coyote traps at work – when to gnaw your arm off

Posted on July 30, 2015 | Leave a comment

Some mornings it just doesn’t seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps. (Phillips)

Coyotes stuck in a trap have been known to gnaw their foot off to escape.  A lot of these three footed coyotes survive for years and do very well. Okay, they do well compared to coyotes that were killed by the trapper.

Scared to leave your job?  Nasty non compete?  Family responsibilities?  Too comfortable?

Are you really going to stay in that job until you retire no matter how you are treated?

If the company starts losing money is the president going to fire himself, or fire YOU? 

Do you have to shoot your boss to get a promotion?

Don’t leave just because you can.  If your job is fulfilling, pays well and gives you a chance to progress to where YOU want to go in your career, STAY.  If you have a history of job skipping, stay awhile even if you don’t like it there.  There are good reasons to stay in your current job.  Fear is not a good reason.

Yesterday I wrote about non competes.  If you are concerned about yours, talk to a lawyer who specializes in employment law.  Many non competes are not enforceable.  That means they are legally unfair or immoral.  You are not morally obligated to do something immoral.  It does not make sense to feel obligated to do what it is not legal to expect of you.

If you have a valid non compete, consider doing whatever you have to do to get out of it.  One good way is to go to your boss and say, “I want a new contract with a more limited non compete.”  Don’t threaten to quit, just ask him to reasonably limit the non compete.  If he says, “No,” you can always start looking for a job.  If he fires you for asking, check with your lawyer.  He may have just voided the non compete.  And last of all, he may realize you are upset and give you a raise or a promotion.

Even if you have to quit and commute 3 hours a day, it is better to quit now rather than later. Do you really think that in 3 years or 10 years you will have LESS obligations and lower expenses than you do now?  Slavery is illegal.  Don’t allow yourself to be a slave.

Don’t let fear paralyze you. Carpe diem. Seize the day.  Carpe jugulum. Grab the day by the throat and make life give you what you deserve.  You CAN change your life.

Something To Do Today

Like your job?  Tell your boss.

Want to leave?  Figure out how.  Don’t be chained to a life of low expectations.

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Later:                          Glass ceilings

The hours game

Confronting your boss

How to leave your job

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Posted in Noncompetes, Promotions, Quitting or Fired

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Non-compete agreement abuse

Posted on July 28, 2015 | Leave a comment

Nothing more completely baffles one who is full of trick and duplicity than straightforward and simple integrity in another. (Colton)

Non-competes

For a year Jim did a two hour commute-one way, every day.  What a horrible thought.  He did it to get out of a non-compete agreement.  Do you think he will ever sign another one?

Lawyers in Pennsylvania are expressly prohibited by law from having non-competes for lawyers.  It is unfair, they say, to do that to lawyers and their clients.  A lawyer leaving a law firm SHOULD be allowed to steal clients.  So why do non-competes apply to everyone else? Because lawyers are paid to write them.

There are reasons to sign a broadly applicable non-compete agreement:

  1. You will be trained from total ignorance to blinding expertise and will be paid lavishly with a guarantee of 1 year of pay after you are fired or quit.

Not a long list.  Is it?

Here’s a list reasons to sign a limited non-compete agreement:

  1. You will learn crucial trade secrets
  2. You might steal customers or employees
  3. You will receive some training and the costs need to be repaid

A simple non-compete clause is the most dangerous. You can be barred from every job in an industry or area if your contract only says, “You will not compete.” Make sure any contract you sign clearly states what specific things you are not allowed to do.  It should list:

  1. A reasonable period of time that you cannot compete (never more than a year)
  2. A precise group you are not allowed to work for or call on
  3. Specific jobs you cannot do for someone else
  4. A geographic area it applies to (within 35 or 50 miles of where you worked)

If you don’t like a contract, change it.  Cross out sections and write in the margins.  Initial the changes.  Handwritten changes on a contract take precedence over the typeset text.

Take control.  You want a job, not a prison.  You need freedom to take another job in order to make this one worthwhile.  Have the guts to change a contract that is too restrictive.  You’ll be surprised how often your changes are accepted.  If they are not accepted, leave.  Value your freedom.

Something To Do Today

Time to gossip.  Ask people you know or strangers you meet at bars or the gym about non-compete agreements.  Get them to tell you horror stories they have heard of.  You will be appalled.  It is an education you need.

 

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Later:

Coyote traps – when to gnaw off your arm

Glass ceilings

The hours game

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Posted in Negotiating, Noncompetes, Quitting or Fired

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